She works hard for the Money

I always wanted to be a bartender, but the work that goes with that just didn’t appeal to me. I will admit to doing some of it when I was younger for a day or too … strictly for the cash.

My dive bar has a reputation for having a difficult time keeping regular bartenders. Some go and never come back while others go and return months later. I have seen a few come back and work only to be fired again or to quit after a few days.

There is one cute little bartender that has returned, she’s cute, perky and full of that sparkle of life. I like her, she’s a good bartender verses the older guy who stands there like a bump on a log. When you’re working for tips, you need to be “on it.” I don’t see this new guy lasting long, too many patrons will start to complain more and more that they wait to long for their poison.

If you are served by a good attentive bartender, please remember to give them a good tip. They’re working hard for their money.

 

money, a to z challenge, sassycat3000, tips

The Joint’s Jumpin’ Jukebox

In the dive bar there is a jukebox (Touchtunes, of course). The owner or bartenders will give a few bucks to a patron who wants to play the jukebox if the joint is too quiet. Charlie would always play some of the best tunes to drink too. There are a few others who play some old tunes from “Back Stabbers” by The O’Jays to “Stuck in the Middle” by Stealers Wheel to some James Taylor to some of todays pop hits. It really varies but there is seldom any rap or hip hop tunes played. Sometimes there is some country or Latino pop played which is all very good.

If you are not aware of it, there is an app so that a person can play Touchtunes without ever having to leave their bar stool. You can find your location and add your money and play all the songs you want from the comfort of your smartphone. Hell you can even connect it to your Spotify account for your playlists.

I seldom play the jukebox because Charlie always did it. Oh something I forgot to mention about the joints jukebox is that it’s also used to relay messages to others in the bar. Like once when I was there with someone who wasn’t Charlie, one of his crew played “Me & Mrs. Jones” by Billy Paul. Then there was another song that was played when I was drunk and hanging out with Mr. Sam. “Never been any Reason” by Head East was played, I was a bit buzzed and I seductively danced to where Mr. Sam was standing. Now, it was kind of labeled as our song for a short time.

Who doesn’t enjoy listening to some good tunes when they’re out drinking and having a good time.

sassycat3000, latina, sexblogger, a to z challenge

 

The Tie that Binds [SS314]

Mr. Sam, like Charlie is not a vanilla partner. Mr. Sam and I have been together for 7 months now, we are getting used to each other. We talk about almost everything, I tend to still get embarrassed about some things.

We recently discussed the idea of mutual masturbation, sex toys and other kinky ideas. He asked me to bring my bag of sex toys over, so I did. We went through all of my toys that were enjoyable for me to use. I had won a contest with some bondage rope included as an extra prize.

He had seen the neon green rope and immediately the Sailor in him started thinking of ways to use it on me. I have never been tied up before by any one. I have some deep seeded trust issues about being restrained. But Mr. Sam is different, even though I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop, a part of me trusts him.

He had mentioned some photo ideas before we got started, but once he started tying the rope, we forgot all about taking any photos. Until after playtime was over, I had to stop because I had pulled on the ropes too hard. Mr. Sam had used one long piece of rope with several loose knots in it for my ankles and wrists. I had pulled on the rope causing it to tighten around my ankles. I had left my socks on, pulled them off to look for any marks because the rope seemed really tight.

This is what I saw when I took off my sock.

 

neon green bondage rope, sinful sunday, skin indentation, latina sexblogger,

I will try to write a story about my first rope experience.

Meanwhile check out some other Sinful Sunday posts.

sinful sunday

 

On the Rocks

My dive bar isn’t a classy place far from it, but the booze is cheap and there is a certain atmosphere that I enjoy when I’m there. There are times when I order a Henry’s Hard Soda or a Barefoot Spritzer and I will ask for a glass of ice. alcohol awareness month

I’ve always wanted to be sitting in a upscale bar and hear someone order a drink on the rocks.

I hear “you want a glass with ice?”

“Yes Please.” And it makes the booze go down quicker and smoother. I have switched back to my old stand-by drink Malibu Rum and pineapple juice. The ice makes it taste so good, refreshing and it goes down quickly. I also love drinking Coconut Mules that’s loaded with tons of ice in the brass mug and its so cold and delicious.

I like sitting on the bar stool with my drink full of ice and a straw so I can nervously stir my drink while waiting on my friends.

ice, a to z challenge, sassycat3000, booze, rum and pineapple

Emergency Exit

Sometimes I wish there was an “emergency exit” door on my life, during those situations when its awkward, uncomfortable or when I know that my behavior will have consequences. Last night was a perfect night for an emergency exit door. Some times I look for the exit door in my relationships. If I can’t find out I’ll make one or cause the other person to push me out of the door.

I guess I look for the exit when my emotions get too much for me. When I feel that I am losing or when I don’t want to deal with the issues at hand. Isn’t it easier just to walk out of that exit door than to have to look at those issues at hand?

Yeah, it’s a cop-out and a lot of people just walk out of the exit door of your life and don’t look back.emergency exit, sassycat3000, borderline personbality disorder, mental illness, blog for mental health awareness, latina sexblogger, a to z challenge

Being a borderline, my emotions are up & down and back & forth. My hand on the exit door handle, threatening to leave the person whom I wish most to connect with. The fear of being smothered mixed with the fear of losing my autonomy pushes me to the door every time. There were a few times that I walked out of the exit door of someone’s life, stood on the other side of the door frantically pulling on the handle attempting to re-enter from the emergency exit. Its impossible and can’t be done. I stand there completely alone, empty and wanting to feel something. Anything to remove the pain of my stupid mistake. Never meaning to hurt the one I love, but I did. Now I’m hurting as well. Now wtf?!

If you happen to fall in love with a Borderline, please know that it’s not you, its them. You need rules. You need to always be communicating with them and breaking everything down so that they understand as if they were a child, but never ever sound condescending. This will push them quicker than ice cream melting on a 90 degree summer day.

Here I stand looking at the emergency exit door. Just looking at it. Considering all my options. I’m not ready to walk through the door just yet.

Why isn’t One Man Enough?

If you are a regular reader of mine, you already know about Mr. Sam.

Last week Mr. Sam hit a rough patch in our friendship. The next day I unloaded most of my emotional wreckage onto my Beloved. He sat there listening to me babble on about Mr. Sam. I think my Beloved thought that the newness of Mr Sam would wear off. However, it has not. Although Mr Sam tends to get under my skin, so does my Beloved so that’s not a big deal. My Beloved knows I get bored with life, friends, family and activities.sassycat3000, latina, sexblogger, relationships, lovers, affairs, wayward

Boredom is my main trigger that gets me into major trouble when I don’t keep a close eye on it. I can get into a lot of trouble when I’m bored. Is that the same as being bored with one man? I believe we were never met to be monogamous. Does that mean we get bored with one partner? I have become bored with my Beloved? Maybe. Routine. Is that boredom. Is it that I am a different person now that I was when I first married him? I think I am a little different, not much. I think that the woman I am now was hiding all those years ago.

My beloved & I have gotten into a comfortable marital rut. You know, routines, patterns and competency. And what is my trigger? Right, boredom. Routines and patterns cause boredom. Through out our marriage I have always had another man in the background. I refer that guy to “the drunk I need in my life.” Because 9 times out of 10 the guy who is in the background is some addict, mainly alcoholics. They provide the chaos and drama I need to keep me going.

Looking back to the early 2000’s when my life hit the skids, when I had my mid-life crisis. It was then I used the internet to escape from reality. I met a few men, through social sites I was on. These men don’t haunt me like they used too. The ones that are fresh in my memory are my 805muse, he was around for almost 7 years. A daily dose of my drunken muse, until he reconnected with sobriety and his cult the JW’s. Not sure about the time frame, but then enters Charlie. Charlie comes back into my life, having his drunk ass in my life was wonderful UNTIL his toxicity contaminated me after years of being clean. I enjoyed having Charlie in my life. However we both knew it was time to end it. So we did just that.

In October 2016 I met Mr. Sam. He has consumed a lot of my time since our meeting. I have neglected so much work, chores and other things. We text during the day when I’m at home. We text in the last evenings before I go to bed. Mr. Sam is always there. There was a few weekends ago when I kicked him to the curb for something I pushed him to do. After a night of thinking I might have lost him, I cried to my Beloved about losing my background guy.  I’m not sure what my Beloved was expecting with this new man in the background at all. I like having Mr Sam in my life, I know he’s always there for me when I need him. He listens, we laugh a lot, we party together and we can understand each other on a different level than my Beloved and I. I really do love Mr Sam, in my own crazy way, more so than the others. I really would hate to give him up. I can’t see what life would be like without him, yet I know deep in my heart – nothing lasts forever.

The morning I cried to my Beloved about Mr Sam, I asked him “why can you be enough? Why isn’t one man enough for me? What’s wrong with me, I feel the need to have two men or sometimes more in my life at all times?” I felt horrible about saying that to him, had he said I would have died. He sat there and listened, comforting me as I cried about the possibility of losing the other man in my life. What sick & twisted shit is this?

Mr Sam looked at me at said “You just want to combine me & your Beloved into one man, into your perfect man.” I laughed and smiled and asked “is that possible?” LOL. Deep in my heart I know this will not end how I envisioned it, but will probably end in more tears and shattered hearts than happily ever after. I wish I knew why one man is not enough for me.

This was Wicked Wednesday’s Prompt #248 

Monday Morning Masturbating [MM131]

It’s a gray drizzly day in Northern Illinois. However, I made it through Monday with a smile on my face after receiving & reading these text along with these photos.

Good morning, Cat….. Thought of your new bra and wanted to show you the effect. I love seeing your breasts swelled in the cups. I like the color and the delicate decoration displaying such beautiful cleavage. It almost looks like your hand is between your thighs, I’d like to think you fingering your clit while taking your photo. Would love to see more of this brassiere, with you in it, of course.

….I woke up thinking of these pics….. I looked at them briefly before going to bed. You are desirable and I got hard thinking of you and as I squeezed my balls and stroked my cock I decided to show you….. the feeling of lust was still there, so I thought of sucking your nipples as I stroked my cock and felt myself cumming so I grabbed my phone.

masturbation monday, latina, sassycat3000, sexblogger, wank, cleavage

As I look at this new photo I may have to masturbate again….You are incredibly sexy, Cat….

I was busy with family things today. However, I arrived home an hour before I had to drive out-of-town for the second half of my work day. I’m sure you can imagine what I was doing before I had to leave for work.

I hope you enjoyed Masturbation Monday as much as we did!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

What are My Strengths? [BFMH]

So what are my character strengths? It’s always difficult to answer these type of questions. I got help with this and took a very intense questionnaire to get the following results. Starting with my top strength, the following are my top 5.

  1.  Humor & Playfulness – Like to laugh and tease, bringing smiles to those that are important. I try to see the lighter side of the situation.  Not sure if this is correct because I don’t always look at the lighter side of intense situations not when it involves me. However, yes, for those in my inner circle I will try to make them laugh because it’s a way for me to cope with the situation and to cope with the fact that my loved one suffering whether emotional, physical or spiritual, etc.
  2.  Judgement, Critical Thinking and Open-Mindedness – Thinking things through and examining it from all sides are important aspects of who I am. I don’t jump to conclusions and I rely on solid evidence to make my decisions. Yes, this is true. I need the facts, just the facts to make my decision about an important situation. I need as much information as I can get and process. However, when I hear the word “judgement”, I think of judging others. Most of my close friends tell me I judge harshly. I try not too, but if someone is making a decision and I have already told them it’s bad, then I judge. Rolling my eyes at them, go help them if they try to share their shit with me after the damage has been done.
  3.  Capability to Love and Be Loved – I value close relations with others, those in which sharing & caring are reciprocated. The people I feel closest to are those people who feel closest to me. True. I ask myself a lot what is love because there are times I feel numb. I doubt that the feelings I have felt for others is love, friendship. However, I will not tolerate a one-sided relationship of any kind. I will end it if I feel I am giving of myself (too much) and getting nothing in return. I may not contact my close friend daily  but when they reach out, I am always there for them.sassycat3000, latina, mental health, emotional, moody, black and white brunette, depressed
  4.  Social Intelligence – I am aware of the motives & the feelings of other people. I know what to do to fit into different social settings and I know what to do to put others at ease. Yeah, this is true. However, I can go deep into this topic. First thing that came to me, is that I want to fit in and belong to a group. When I don’t get that right away I find it challenging to make it a goal to fit in. Once I get into the group, I tend break from that mold they want their members to fit into and get pushed back out of the group. But by then I no longer am interested in being part of that group. Two; I always say “there is a motive for every human action.” I want to know what’s pushing them to do what they do. Most of the time I can feel what my close friends are feeling, I try to turn the tables so they can then see it from the other side. However, most of the time I can’t do this for myself. I need someone to turn the table for me.
  5.  Honest, Authenticity and Genuineness – I am an honest person. Not only by speaking, but by living an authentic & genuine life. I am down to earth and without pretense. I am a “real” person. I would disagree with this one. I am honest with it benefits me. I can be brutally honest to where I unintentionally hurt the other persons feelings.  I do not live a truthful, authentic life. I did once upon a time, now I’m lying to myself and others.
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