Yea yea….I know that the #atozchallenge is mostly for writing about subjects that start with the letters of the alphabet but I’m winging it (again) and bending the rules.
What ever pops into my head that starts with the letters, is for I’m going for. Be ready for anything this month. Of course I’m behind on posting. I’m blaming that on my wayward life, that includes Mr. Sam and My Beloved, family etc.
Better late than never, my friend the Artist.
A is for Artist
Friday December 30, 2017 I had an emotional melt down. A day of feeling only sadness. It was the same day I took the Cat Woman photos.
I took those first, I started to feel the emotions build up inside and I thought I’m going to go with it.
I didn’t want to use the Nikon, so I used my iPhone. I held the smartphone as the tears started to flow down my face.
What kind of shocked me is how much I liked how they came out. I shared this with some of my friends, who had invited me to a New Year’s Eve party. I told them, “I’m not attending I’m just not feeling it. They said “you look so sad in those photos.” Good. Because that was what I was going for.
Mr. Sam said “Looking at them makes me sad, but I can’t stop looking at them.” Mr. Sam came up with the titles for these photos.
I have since snapped myself out of that 24 hr meltdown. I am back to my sarcastic and slutty habits.
Click the banner below to find out who else has been sinful….
Today is just one of those days. I feel nothing. Should I feel something? I look in the mirror & see a monster, a freak…something that should never see the sunlight. So for now I’ll hate myself & play in my darkness.
I’ve slacked off on my blogging. I’ve slacked off on all my chores. I come up with all sorts of excuses as to why shit is not done.
My weight has spiraled out of control. “STOP bitching!”
I tell myself…”get up off your fat lazy ass and do something about it!”
Yeah in my head I can see myself doing the exercises, I see that beautiful body I want. Self defeat overcomes me before I even start.
Where the fuck am I going with this? Completely lost direction-again!
I finished my classes. Have another job. Where?!?! Working at a Halloween store. It’s actual work! Omfg! All that standing, walking. My back can’t take this shit. I’m sure there are other people out there that feel & suffer a lot more than I do. I have no right to complain. Do I? Not sure, what or how to feel.
My darkness is like those comfortable old pair of jeans.
Watching him sleep. I haven’t noticed his salt & pepper hair. I started playing with it, tugging on it gently. He didn’t wake up. I decided to take this photo.
[ABOVE] A lock on the back gate in our backyard.
[BELOW] The lock on his shed. He built this shed from a blueprint in his head. It’s a huge shed. His shed reminds me of those one room shed-type homes.
Trying something new. I don’t remember how I found Cee’s blog, but she has some really creative weekly photo challenges.
This month’s prompt is the word “change.”
What does the word “change” inspire in you? Change of heart, sea change, perhaps the change in your pocket? Does it inspire fear or excitement? Dread or anticipation? Show me what the word means to you in an image! – Sinful Sunday
Change is always difficult, uncomfortable. Change can be good and liberating. Most people don’t like change and I’m not talking about the change in my pocket. lol. Most of us have those bloggers who inspires us to push ourselves. By pushing ourselves we can grow, this comes through change. I have two bloggers that when I see their photos, I say to myself “I wish I could take photos like that!”
Photos in which they are nude and seem to be 100% comfortable with their bodies. I have deep seeded issues when it comes to showing off my naked body, caused by the mental & verbal abuse of two of my exes. You will probably never see my fully nude body. However, I am attempting to change how I see myself by stepping outside my comfortable zone by taking some photos that are different from my regular style.
Click the banner below to see more posts about “change” on this Sinful Sunday
Thanks to Wicked Butterfly for giving me the opportunity to review Fetish Fantasy Series Mini Nipple Plungers.
When I finish my review you can read it here.
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