Why isn’t One Man Enough?

If you are a regular reader of mine, you already know about Mr. Sam.

Last week Mr. Sam hit a rough patch in our friendship. The next day I unloaded most of my emotional wreckage onto my Beloved. He sat there listening to me babble on about Mr. Sam. I think my Beloved thought that the newness of Mr Sam would wear off. However, it has not. Although Mr Sam tends to get under my skin, so does my Beloved so that’s not a big deal. My Beloved knows I get bored with life, friends, family and activities.sassycat3000, latina, sexblogger, relationships, lovers, affairs, wayward

Boredom is my main trigger that gets me into major trouble when I don’t keep a close eye on it. I can get into a lot of trouble when I’m bored. Is that the same as being bored with one man? I believe we were never met to be monogamous. Does that mean we get bored with one partner? I have become bored with my Beloved? Maybe. Routine. Is that boredom. Is it that I am a different person now that I was when I first married him? I think I am a little different, not much. I think that the woman I am now was hiding all those years ago.

My beloved & I have gotten into a comfortable marital rut. You know, routines, patterns and competency. And what is my trigger? Right, boredom. Routines and patterns cause boredom. Through out our marriage I have always had another man in the background. I refer that guy to “the drunk I need in my life.” Because 9 times out of 10 the guy who is in the background is some addict, mainly alcoholics. They provide the chaos and drama I need to keep me going.

Looking back to the early 2000’s when my life hit the skids, when I had my mid-life crisis. It was then I used the internet to escape from reality. I met a few men, through social sites I was on. These men don’t haunt me like they used too. The ones that are fresh in my memory are my 805muse, he was around for almost 7 years. A daily dose of my drunken muse, until he reconnected with sobriety and his cult the JW’s. Not sure about the time frame, but then enters Charlie. Charlie comes back into my life, having his drunk ass in my life was wonderful UNTIL his toxicity contaminated me after years of being clean. I enjoyed having Charlie in my life. However we both knew it was time to end it. So we did just that.

In October 2016 I met Mr. Sam. He has consumed a lot of my time since our meeting. I have neglected so much work, chores and other things. We text during the day when I’m at home. We text in the last evenings before I go to bed. Mr. Sam is always there. There was a few weekends ago when I kicked him to the curb for something I pushed him to do. After a night of thinking I might have lost him, I cried to my Beloved about losing my background guy.  I’m not sure what my Beloved was expecting with this new man in the background at all. I like having Mr Sam in my life, I know he’s always there for me when I need him. He listens, we laugh a lot, we party together and we can understand each other on a different level than my Beloved and I. I really do love Mr Sam, in my own crazy way, more so than the others. I really would hate to give him up. I can’t see what life would be like without him, yet I know deep in my heart – nothing lasts forever.

The morning I cried to my Beloved about Mr Sam, I asked him “why can you be enough? Why isn’t one man enough for me? What’s wrong with me, I feel the need to have two men or sometimes more in my life at all times?” I felt horrible about saying that to him, had he said I would have died. He sat there and listened, comforting me as I cried about the possibility of losing the other man in my life. What sick & twisted shit is this?

Mr Sam looked at me at said “You just want to combine me & your Beloved into one man, into your perfect man.” I laughed and smiled and asked “is that possible?” LOL. Deep in my heart I know this will not end how I envisioned it, but will probably end in more tears and shattered hearts than happily ever after. I wish I knew why one man is not enough for me.

This was Wicked Wednesday’s Prompt #248 

Dates, Mates & Relationships [TMITuesday]

1. Which of these are you most often guilty of in a relationship:
a. jealousy…..this is really bad when I’m drunk. I’m jealous over men that I have no right to be, because they are not mine. I get a tab jealous of my few female friends however, not as much as with my men.
b. not apologizing…..I never used to say “sorry.” My beloved worked on me for years, I do apologize when its my fault or if I hurt you.
c. not keeping your word
d. guilt trips…not so much anymore, but I can still manipulate a situation for my benefit.

2. Which of the following behaviors would annoy you most in a partner.
a. fishing for compliments by verbalizing self-doubt…I do this more than he does, but he still does it just doesn’t bother me.
b. passive-aggressive behavior…this would get on nerves after a while.
c. usually forgets important dates i.e., birthday, anniversary…don’t really care all that much. Because I discussed that ahead of time. The only real important date is my birthday! My card and or gift must be on the dining room table before I start my day. Or it must be handed to me before my birthday, not the evening of shit.
d. making you feel guilty when spending time with friends

3. Consider you are looking for a mate, rank these traits in order of importance, with 1 being most important, and 7 being least important.
_5_ Kindness
_1__ Honesty
_6_ Ambitious
_3__ Confidence
_2__ Reliable
_7__ Assertive
_4__ Sense of Humor

4. Score! You exchanged numbers with a hottie. Now you: (pick one)
a. Wait for a week, see if that person calls you first.
b. Call the next day if not sooner.
c. Call and text incessantly. Let them know they’ve made an impression.
d. You’d never call. What if you get rejected?

5. How did you handle your last relationship break up?
a. You’ve never been in a relationship before. The timing’s never been right.
b. You went out and got drunk every night, until you forgot everything.
c. You went out on a massive amount of date, even with people you knew you had no interest, making sure to date a new face every night.
d. You felt bad and cried, but bounced back in a couple of days….months and months..I think that’s a year. LOL

Bonus: Would you take a holiday all by yourself, at the ‘spur of the moment’? Why or Why not? Where would you go? Probably not. I’m too scared to go too far from home…alone. I could travel to someone’s place by myself…but not just go somewhere, anywhere alone or spur of the moment.

 

Monday Morning Masturbating [MM131]

It’s a gray drizzly day in Northern Illinois. However, I made it through Monday with a smile on my face after receiving & reading these text along with these photos.

Good morning, Cat….. Thought of your new bra and wanted to show you the effect. I love seeing your breasts swelled in the cups. I like the color and the delicate decoration displaying such beautiful cleavage. It almost looks like your hand is between your thighs, I’d like to think you fingering your clit while taking your photo. Would love to see more of this brassiere, with you in it, of course.

….I woke up thinking of these pics….. I looked at them briefly before going to bed. You are desirable and I got hard thinking of you and as I squeezed my balls and stroked my cock I decided to show you….. the feeling of lust was still there, so I thought of sucking your nipples as I stroked my cock and felt myself cumming so I grabbed my phone.

masturbation monday, latina, sassycat3000, sexblogger, wank, cleavage

As I look at this new photo I may have to masturbate again….You are incredibly sexy, Cat….

I was busy with family things today. However, I arrived home an hour before I had to drive out-of-town for the second half of my work day. I’m sure you can imagine what I was doing before I had to leave for work.

I hope you enjoyed Masturbation Monday as much as we did!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Mouth Couldn’t Handle the Overflow [MM125]

Continuing from “Having Drinks with Mr. Sam” ….

Mr. Sam & I got comfortable in his room. He turned on his TV. I laid on the bed. We watched tv for a bit. Talking about the cool tv shows that each of us has watched. He lies on the bed opposite direction of me. I’m touching his leg and he is laying there looking at me. There are no words, just the background noise of the TV. I’m just touching him, caressing him and we are enjoying each other’s company. I crawled up to his lips and kissed him. We kissed for a while, but not for long. I pulled up his shirt so I could feel his skin.

sex story, sexblogger, latina, sassycat3000,

I stared deep into his eyes, smiled at him. I unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans. He watched me, helping me push down his jeans, he pulls off his thermal shirt. I run my fingers over his chest. Kissing his tummy, moving down to his semihard cock. I took his cock in my hand, stroking it gently but nothing too serious, nothing that would get him super excited. I held his cock in one hand and rubbed the head with my other hand, circular motions. I heard a few sounds of enjoyment from his lips. He laid his head back and shut his eyes. Then he would glance up at me and watch me again. Stroking more. What I  enjoyed was massaging his balls. I deliberately move my fingers over his pubic hair, his response was a turn on. He sighed and took a deep gasp, his head back with his eyes shut. When I paused he glanced at me.

I gave him that look. I took his cock into my mouth. He has a nice-looking cock. He’s cock is standard size, I like the way it looks and how it feels in my mouth. His cock isn’t too thick but thank goodness it isn’t too thin either. He’s very natural with his wild, long dark pubic hair. He watches me take all his cock into my mouth. I feel the bottom of his cock and I breathe in his scent. My hands are caressing his body, fingers moving through his pubic hair and the other hand caressing his balls. My mouth moves up & down his rod, my tongue swirls around the tip with a light force and I listen to him moan once again. Deep. Deeper. His cock hits the back of my throat. I didn’t struggle to accommodate him in nor did his cock make my eyes (this time). I was taking him in slowly, Playing with him, teasing him, watching his response with every move. There was a sexblogger, latina, sex stories, oral sex, blowjobmoment when I was sucking on him, licking his cock with my tongue. I glanced at him and he watched at me. It’s not something I regularly do when giving a lover a blowjob. It’s something that makes me feel like I am connecting with the man and that’s not always a good idea. But Mr. Sam is tender, sensitive and has demons that torment him more than mine ever do.

I saw him settle back into his pillow, his arm over his forehead. He’s breathing hard, his body is tight. My hands reach up his chest. I suck faster. I listen to him moan, this excites me on to hear him. I reposition myself to the middle of his legs. One hand on his now erect cock, kneeling I suck on him quicker. Harder. He’s moving his pelvis up & down to fuck my mouth. His movement is matching mine, I felt his hands on the sides of my head as I’m sucking him. He wanted to hold on to my head as he fucked my mouth with his hard cock. But his hands don’t stay on my head. He quickly let’s go of my head. I felt his body tighten even more as he stretches out. The deep breathing and moaning is increasing. I take his cock down to the bottom and swallow expecting that he is about to come. I watch his back arch slightly and I feel the surge of his hot creamy milk hit the back of my throat. I’m drinking and consuming his hot milk, suddenly I can no longer keep up with the volume of cream that is filling up my mouth. He tastes sharp, bitter and salty. I felt his cock softened, his body was relaxed. I let his cock slip gently from my mouth. It was still dripping a little of cum and that’s when I took the picture.

Afterwards I joked with Mr. Sam “I couldn’t keep up with the overflow. That’s never happened before.”

With a chuckle in his voice he jokes “Overflow. That’s another new nickname for you.”

Good to the last drop” is the next post about Mr. Sam

E[Lust] 90


Photo courtesy of Rebel’s Notes

Welcome to Elust 90

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #91 Start with the rules, come back February 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Conflicted part 1

Glow

Happy Endings

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Please You to Please Me

How to suck my cock – part 1 (attitude)

 

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Visions of Sugarplums

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

 

Writing About Writing

The Curious Case of Trigger Warnings
Writing About It All

Thoughts & Advice on Kink & Fetish

PLEASING THE MISTRESS
Reader Q&A: Dominant women struggle, turn-ons
Chastity Questions
Not every hole is a goal

Erotic Non-Fiction

A Picture is Worth…
Morning Stretch
Lovemaking Almost Too Brilliant To Describe
The GP
I Want
Indescribable Pleasure
Humiliating an ex-Nazi: Raylene’s 2nd dozen
Preparation
I love big, fat dicks

Erotic Fiction

Dude, You’re Wet!
When Love Becomes a Weakness
On a Silver Platter
The Silent Treatment
A Seasonal Affair
Three in a Stall
Schoolgirl Uniform
The New Principal 4: Escape

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Anal Retentive Or Just OCD?

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

BuzzFeed Femdom

Poetry

-06.01.17_13:22-
Mistletoe: A Lusty Limerick

 

Elust 88

Will Work for Heels [KOTW]

High heels. Ever since I can remember my mother as always told me “You have beautiful feet and gorgeous legs, you should try to always wear heels.” I think because my mother was short and had Barney Rubble feet she wanted to live vicariously through me. I did listen to her advice (most of the time).

Then I met my Beloved, who also told me the same thing. In 2008, I hit a low point in my life. My beloved had mentioned me taking some photos of my legs in nylons wearing heels for him to wank to when he was in the mood. I complied. My self-esteem was still low even after all his attention and compliments, he suggested I use one of the photos as my avatar on an old social media site I was on at the time.

So I did.

The attention I received was addicting. I was first approached by a gentleman who I refer to as “Papi” who asked me if I would consider modeling for him in a pair of shoes who would send me. Wait. What? I recieved a pair of Guess Black peep toe sling backs and a pair of two-tone brown Charles David pumps. I took the photos and a video for him. I emailed him the photos that my Beloved had taken. Not quality photos images, of course but its all I had to work with. There was one little thing, the shoes had been masturbated with and had cum inside them.

sassycat3000 shoes

Thanks to my 818Shoe Papi for giving me these shoes!

I know, some of you are thinking…GROSS! Not me. Oh, its not my fetish, but I do get off on the attention. I get off on knowing that these men (that I have never met in person) buy shoes with me in mind and masturbate with the shoe and then send them to me.

Oh I did forget to mention “MarkX” who invited me to check out a website he had found. MarkX masturbated while wearing his own pair of high heels and dressed in panties. MarkX is the only one (so far) that I have sent my shoes, panties and leather clothes to. He masturbated with my items, heels included and returned everything back to me. I got off on know he was jerking off to my things. When I joined the site he suggested it snowballed from there. It was a shoe fetish site that had several different categories of shoes, even men in heels, Trannies in heels, trashed heels, you get the idea. There were a few women on the site, but after a while of getting bombarded with emails it was overwhelming and I pretty much let it go.

Read more about Cat’s Adventures with Shoes

I have met several interesting men through that website, most have disappeared. However the high heels they sent to me, most of those still remain. I was thinking about donating some of them. They’re old and worn out and I just don’t have the room in my closet for them anymore. I don’t wear them as much as I did either. That’s due to my broken foot and soon I’ll have to have a surgery to fused the bones in my foot. No more heels after that.

I can’t stop myself when walking into any store that sells shoes to go and look at them. I love looking at them. I don’t need them, not fetish here like that. But I do enjoy watching men looking at my legs and shoes and feet when I’m in public. When I go to the “dive bar” I’ve worn heels during the summer and watching the guys look at me is so very addicting. I think of some of them who may have a heel fetish and will be wanking off later to a snapshot memory of me in heels.

I do have certain styles of shoes that I love more than others. I love wedges, always have. They are the easiest to walk on and most comfortable for me. I did buy a pair of wedges at the end of the season, only $5

black wedges, sassycat3000, sexblogger, shoe fetish, high heels

I love shoes with ankle straps. I’m not into peep toe shoes too much, I’ll wear them but if I can get something else I will. I don’t wear very strappy heels, like those that are normally advertised during wedding season or prom. I love platform shoes, mary janes and the traditional pump when needed.

I have taken so many photos with heels that I’ve lost count and sadly my blog is so unorganized that the photos are all over the place. I’ve tried to get a few together to share on this post.

This is Christmas 2016.

silver shoes, sassycat3000, sexblogger, high heels,

 

 

Interior – The Dive Bar

When you walk inside you can’t help but to notice the untreated hard wood floors. The wood-paneled walls, the pool tables and the bathroom doors with huge wooden handles that look like they’re from the Viking period.

Continuing to walking you see the most beautiful tables. The tables are cuts made from trees. Odd shaped, bark still on the sides and covered in a thick shellac. A few slot machines are there for those who enjoy to toss their money away.

interior, barlife,

At the bar there is an overload of visual stimuli. There are stickers plastered all over the glass door that leads inside the walk-in cooler. There is a beer barrel sticking out of the wall with a tap on it for the beer of the week. There is random candy boxes, potato chips and other snacks placed on the bar. The top of the bar is covered with bottles and bottles of every sort of alcohol.

There is a tiny cooler that keeps cold single bottles of wine, such as Barefoot. There are single bottles of Henry’s Hard Soda, Mike’s Hard varieties. And different flavored beer like the blueberry stuff, which is totally gross.

interior, barlife,

The Interior of this dive bar has always been interesting, dark and reminded me of something out of the 70’s that hasn’t caught up to present day. A person can’t sit there and not find something to stare at. Whether its one of the big screen TV’s or if it’s any of the bizarre, unique and quirky items hanging somewhere in that bar.

New Years Letter from 2016 to 2017

Dear 2017,

 

I wanted to tell you a bit about me, last year 2016.

A few of my best moments were…

Kyle Nicolaides of beware of darkness, music, vocalist,

  • Going to Chicago and meeting two bands “Beware of Darkness” and “The Struts.” They are two very down to earth bands who are so approachable you forget they’re famous. The Struts have had their songs played in the new TV show “Lethal Weapon” and Beware of Darkness has their song “Howl” in the movie “Bad Santa 2.”Gethin Davies The Struts
  • Getting to go to New Orleans to see both of the above bands AGAIN! Only this time with VIP passes. I have always wanted to go to Nola and I did. Fucking Amazing! I walked the streets of Nola with a few of the band members. A dream come true.

  • Meeting some new people, like Mr. Sam. Even thought he drives me crazy. Hanging out with the drunks at the bar, writing about The Bar, The Booze and Me. Sure, it shouldn’t be one of the best moments, but they were so fun god damn moments!
  • Receiving two Blogging Awards Molly’s Top 100 Sex Blogs and Rebel’s Top 20 Blogs of ’16. Knowing a few of my peers here, think that I have what it takes to run with some of the big dogs makes my clit hard! 😉
  • Receiving gifts from a few of my followers/fans. This tickled my pretty pink places and those men get top treatment from me when ever I can give it. Finding some new blogs to follow.
  • Having more companies approach me to write reviews. This is great, especially the different stuff. I don’t like reviewing the stuff that every one writes about. Provide some variety out here.

Some of the difficult, hard or worst times….

  • At the top of the list would have been losing Charlie. We ended our friendship in early October then he left from “camp.” I didn’t get to say goodbye to him, I haven’t heard from him and probably never will. I heard unfounded rumors that he has cancer. Not sure if I want to know if its true or not. I even found some journal entries that I wrote about that time in my life.
  • Early June the Manchild was in a car accident and totaled his new car. Financially that set him back, set us back a bit as well. We bought a used truck for him to drive. He moved back to Illinois this October. That’s the silver lining. However, financially we have struggled just enough to feel at times uncomfortable.
  • During the summer, the Beloved was home due to two hand surgeries. He was unable to do pretty much anything and everything. He just sat around all summer watching movie and eating. His 42 yrs of being on the job is finally catching up to him, his body can’t take it like when he was in this 20’s. It’s difficult to see him uncomfortable and in pain.

My Hopes for you 2017…

  • Continue blogging, writing and journaling everything and anything. To blog about being a person with Borderline Personality Disorder, followed by all the stuff that happens due to having BPD.
  • To continue to review products for companies, not just sex toys but health, beauty and household, reviews.
  • To learn discipline with blogging. To finish the challenges I start. To get more creative with the sex stories that are based on my (sometimes Borderline driven) issues.
  • To learn to be a better friend to those who reach out to me.
  • To learn why a certain type of male is attracted to me and how to break that cycle.
  • To learn more about the Law of Attraction.

Focusing on you 2017….

  • Continuing to focus on this website, blogging and photography. I think that we have finally found somewhat of a niche in the blogosphere.
  • Focusing on education. Read somewhere that there are FREE classes at the local library. Lets look into that, maybe some writing courses, computer courses would be helpful, don’t you think so?
  • Focusing on getting the household in order and really doing it this year!
  • Mental Health, keeping focus on the triggers so that I don’t get in over my head when it comes to certain things.
  • My Marriage, not to neglect it and to appreciate it. Everything else can burn away, but without him in my life I would be lost.

happy new year 2017, sassycat3000, copyright @sassycat3000.net

There are some of my highlights and lowlights, so 2017 I do hope you can be a little more focused, determined. Following me shouldn’t be too bad, there is always more to learn, more to smile about. Laugh, someone said not to take yourself too serious, have fun with what you do. Don’t always be afraid to show the emotion, let yourself shine 2017.

Thanks for the memories,

Best Wishes from Year 2016

Year

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